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Debbie H.
Age: Under 30
State: Indiana
Debbie did not wish to share her email for personal reasons but I'm sure you will agree that her story is one of enormous courage. Please read on!

Story Title: "It hasn't got the best of me yet"

My story started back in 1997 when I found a knot on my right side next to my left breast. I was only 24 and a single mom with two kids at the time. I had to have my left breast removed and begin taking chemo. The chemos made me deathly sick the entire time but NOT once did I ever give up hope. 

After 6 months they told me I was fine. I thought to myself that I would never have to worry about this again until my back started hurting in 2002. The doctors did a bone scan at that time and they said they could see something on my spine but they didn't know what it was and that they were going to keep an eye on it.

Six months later I had planned on seeing a doctor because I was hurting so bad in my back I couldn't sleep or eat. I was getting dressed one morning when I fell and couldn't move. For one week I was in the hospital (not the best one) and they did nothing for me, no testing or anything. Finally I went to my doctor and they determined that my breast cancer had come back and had spread to the bones. They also told me that it was in my ribs, shoulders, hip and the spine and the doctors only gave me a month to live.

For about three months I was bed ridden. If someone moved me a little I would scream with pain, pain that I had never felt before. My family brought in some caregivers to help and the caregivers wanted to tell my children that I was going to die. That's when my family asked them to leave and never come back. I asked why and they said they werenít giving up hope yet and when the time came they would tell the kids, they werenít giving up so why should I.

I talked to the dear lord and never asked him to heal me, I just asked him to let me live long enough to see my kids grow up. People from all over prayed for me and since then three years have pasted. Iím still taking chemo once a week (Perception, and Taxotere are my chemos) and they have kept me alive this long and I will have to take it the rest of my life.

About a month ago they told me that the taxotere had quit working and it has spread in other parts of my bones. Now their trying novalbine, another type of chemo, along with the herciptin. I won't know if it's working for a few more months.

Throughout all of this everyone around me who didn't know me thought I was going to die. My family and friends and I all knew that God was on my side. I've heard a lot of people ask why this has happened to me but not once have I asked why. I think to myself Iím glad it's me and not one of my kids or my sisters or my mom that is going through this. I just couldn't handle it if I knew it was someone close to me.

I thank God everyday that I wake up and have another day with my family. If it wasn't for my husband my kids and the rest of my family, who have gave me hope, I wouldn't be here. I don't know how much time I have left but Iím not leaving this life without a fight. When it's my time to go I will know that I lived my life the best I know how. If heaven is like they say it is I'll be just fine and waiting for my family and friends to come.

Never give up no matter what the doctors say. They are not God and they don't know when youíre going to die. It's a scary time for me but I know that Iím one of the lucky ones, it could have been much worse.

Debbie


Comments from Debbie: Please forgive me if I haven't spelled everything right. I have what they call chemo brain. It's where I forget how to spell, do math and lose my short-term memory. Iím sorry for your lose, Diane sounded like a great woman and I wish I could have met her.

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